Just Say No

Have you ever encountered a situation where you said yes to something, even though you really wanted to say no? How did you handle it after? Did you do it? Did you avoid it even though you said yes?

This is a tricky, but all-important skill to learn. Many people say yes to everything, in order to avoid the emotions that go along with saying no. They say yes to avoid the conflict, and then end up regretting saying it and don't know how to fix the situation.

We have spoken before about volunteering and being active, but I wanted to go back and focus on this important point a little more. It is okay to say no. In fact, you are encouraged to say no when you need to.

So how do you decide what to say yes to, and what to say no to?

For me, I reference my personal mission and my goals. Each week I sit down with my success journal, review my goals, and create my weekly to-do list and prioritize it. From there, I break those weekly tasks into steps I need to be taking each day to align myself with my mission and my goals. I have learned that if I don't have my to-do list properly created and thought out, other people will fill it for me, and that can take needed time away from my priorities.

By doing this, I know in my head what I need to get done each day, and what I am striving to achieve. When I am asked to do something, I always make sure I listen properly, and ask questions to clarify what I am being approached with. From there, I weigh the expected amount of time (or money, or work) against my to-do list, and see if it fits in. If it does, I go one step further and question if it fits into my long-term goals in some way.

I don't say no to everything. If I can say yes to something knowing that I will 100% be able to keep my word, and that it fits in with my goals, I will say yes. If I know for certain that I can't commit to something, or am unsure if I have the time, or know it's something I just don't see lining up with my priorities, I respectfully say no.

It's not easy. It never seems to get easier, however I know that when I am saying no or even saying yes, I am doing it for the right reasons. By living my life this way, and being focused on what is important to me, I am able to work towards my "someday", but still find ways to help others.

Remember, get your personal mission, set your goals, say yes when it fits, and when it doesn't, just say no.