Wise Words from Yoda: A Path to Eliminating Self Sabotage

Self sabotage can be heard all around you. Excuses. Doubt. Fear. They all can be heard in the words people say or the actions people do. I’m sure we have all used words like ‘I can’t, I’m not sure, maybe, I’ll try, if only I had’; these are all words and thoughts that are based on insecurities and doubt. When we use them often, they reinforce an attitude of self sabotage. The problem with self sabotage is that if you believe what you say long enough, it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

In the movie Star Wars, Yoda is known for dispensing some wise advice. Here are three statements that will help you on your path to eliminating self sabotage.

“Try not. Do or do not, there is no try.”

Confidence comes from doing. Yes this is also how we make mistakes, but that is all part of the learning process. Thinking things through and getting things done. My daughter called me last night from her dorm room at University. She and a couple of friends were working on an economics assignment. They had a few questions. I listened to them explain the situation and it was evident hearing some self sabotaging language. It was easy to hear the doubt in their words as they described the math formula that was being used. So much so, that instead of attempting to solve the problem, they called for help right away. I believe that my role as a parent at that point is not to give them the answer but to build their confidence to have the conviction to attempt to solve their own problem. This can be a very fine line. The easy way out for all of us last night, including me because I was busy doing other things, was for me to just give the answer. I didn’t know the others on the phone but I do know my daughter’s capabilities, so I started by having her explain what she did understand with the problem. I asked where she was stuck and then we talked about how she approached these kinds of math problems in the past. She knew how to do it, there just had been too much time in between the last time she worked on these problems and she just lost a little confidence. Giving in to self sabotage was not the answer. As we built confidence one step at a time, it was easy to hear in her voice when she felt like she got it. Eliminating self sabotage is about doing. Confidence comes from doing. For me it was rewarding to get the phone call an hour later from my daughter. After her assignment she had to log on the University site and write a timed quiz on her economics assignment. She was so proud to tell me she passed with a 92%.

Luke: “I can’t believe it.” Yoda: “That is why you fail.”

Success and confidence germinates through conviction. We’ve all heard someone say “I’ll believe it when I see it”. Yoda teaches us to rephrase this sentence “I’ll see it when I believe it”. To eliminate self sabotage you must start by eliminating the negative beliefs of doubt. When Walt Disney spoke of his formula for success, the word believe was instrumental. Walt said to succeed you must Dream, Believe, Dare and Do. He expanded his thought under the word believe by saying that you must implicitly and unquestionably believe that you can attain your dream. No self sabotaging words here.

“Size matters not ... Look at me. Judge me by size, do you?”

Yoda understood the power he had and believed in himself. How often others doubt their own value because they compare it to someone else’s or they are too busy focussing on what is wrong in their lives.

You and I, we all have greatness in us. Different strengths manifest themselves in different ways with different people. Embrace the greatness that you already have and use that to fuel more opportunities to expand to higher levels of greatness.

Don’t allow self sabotage to minimize your success or enjoyment of life. Choose to use empowering words. Choose to embrace accountability for actions. Choose to do not try.

Choose to let the Yoda out in you.